Be Back REAL Soon!

You guys!!! I’m deeeeeeeeeep in cleaning/organizing/straightening up mode in our new place. I actually wrote about it for my High Straightenence post today. Go check it out!

To say things are hectic is an understatement! I’m super overwhelmed…and sore…OMG am I sore! This house has too many stairs. How did I not remember this from my childhood? So, we’re living in chaos right now with a 3.5 year old running around getting into EVERYTHING. It’s bonkers!  I’m totally booking myself a massage when this is over.

I want to share two things:

This is the first meal I made in the new place. Breakfast for dinner. My favorite!

The only thing is that I couldn’t find the box where my salt & pepper are. Boo.

I also need to find my booze box. Where the heck is that box? Where are my jars to drink out of? I need those too.

When I went to clean out this bathroom cabinet today, I got a flashback after looking at this contact paper. I remember  being a kid and snooping around my mom’s makeup bag in that cabinet. I loved when she went out to dinner with my dad because it meant prime snooping time. I totally tried on her clothes and makeup. She’s totally reading this right now. Hi MOM!

I think I might save that contact paper…What do you think? Will I feel like I’m snooping in my own cabinet?

Soooooooo I have a favor to ask you. I’m a little stressy right now and could use your help. Will you tell me a story? Tell me something funny? Tell me what you’re into right now? Tell me something so that when I take a computer break while digging through the chaos, I’ll have something to lift my spirits? Please and thank you!

I’ll be back soon. I’m hoping to unpack my kitchen soon so I can get this party started.

Oh BTW- that picture up at the top there? That’s the morning light on the breakfast table. I’m so excited by the light in this house. My photos are gonna be so different and I’m totally welcoming the change/challenge.

  • Kristen M.

    Funny anecdote: I noticed that one of our front bushes had a totally wanged (yes, that’s a word) area in it that was suspiciously kid- and bike-shaped. I asked said kid about it (“hey kid, did you run your bike into the bush and break the branches in that area?”) and what did he say with a totally straight face? “Oh yes, that’s Bush Ruins.”
    Good luck on your moving/cleaning/unpacking chores!

  • Chris

    Funny story: stray cats like to go through our backyard sometimes, and I oh so happen to have a VERY territorial cat guarding my home through the safety of the window sill of my bedroom. On occasional nights, she will begin hissing and growling through the window at whatever stray happens to walk on by. One day I recorded her on my phone throwing one of these tantrums and when play it around her, and she reacts to it! Her ears perk up, her eyes widen and looks all over the room for whatever cat it making that noise. It’s priceless how she seriously doesn’t recognize her own growls haha.

    Good luck on the move and take a nice, long relaxing bath to ease the soreness once you’re done!

  • Katie

    It’s been a while, but I wanted to thank you for your generous spirit. I attended Homefries U, and speaking with you about life with kids really made my trip. You have an inspiring zest for life, I wish you all the best!

  • Kathryn

    I have one word for you: Eurovision. Have a look on You Tube. You won’t be disappointed.

  • Nadine

    You’re my favourite! You always seem happy and that makes me happy! always does it for me 🙂

  • Nadine

    You’re my favourite! You always seem happy and that makes me happy!
    icanhascheezburger always does it for me 🙂

  • Panya

    Funny stuff my niece & nephews have done recently that I’ve posted on Twitter and/or Facebook…

    [FYI, Nephew A is 7.5, Niece B is 5, Nephew B is 3]

    Nephew B: Dere [There’s] Mickey Mouse an’ Dirl [Girl] Mickey Mouse!
    My mom: That’s Minnie Mouse.
    Nephew B: Nuh-uh, it Mickey Mouse wit bow on him head!
    Nephew A [after Nephew B accidentally hit him]: I know he doesn’t mean it when he says he’s sorry.
    Me: He’s a baby, it’s okay.
    Nephew B: Me not a baby!
    Me: Oh, I’m sorry, you’re a little boy.
    Nephew B: Me not a little boy!
    Me: You said you were a little boy yesterday!
    Nephew A: He’s just a BIG BABY!
    Nephew B: Me a big boy-baby!
    Nephew A: You know, I’m in second grade here, I really don’t need to learn that much more.
    Niece B [watching Curious George]: People can’t have monkeys for a pet!
    My mom: Some people do.
    Niece B: MY mom won’t have a monkey for a pet.
    My mom: Why not?
    Niece B: ‘Cause her won’t buy monkey food!
    Potty-training Nephew B, he looks down at his shorts pooled on floor & panics: “WHERE MY FEET?!” Yes, little-known fact, sitting to use the potty makes your feet disappear.
    [Long, but worth the read]
    Nephew A & Niece B are playing “store” — A is the clerk & B is shopping — she thinks she deserves “change” from the “cash” she gave him [we save those fake credit cards from junk mail for them to play with]. I look over & they’re both on imaginary cell phones…
    A: Yeah, police? This lady is trying to steal my money!
    B: I did not! I just need my change!
    A: You’re coming to arrest her? Okay! [to B] You’re going to jail!
    Then he gets up to put her in invisible handcuffs.
    …I start typing this & they go back to playing normally. She goes to “leave” with her purchases & A accuses her of not paying enough. Then they get back on their imaginary phones…
    A: Police? This lady is trying to steal my stuff!
    B: I already paid for it!
    A: Give me your ring and then I’ll tell them not to arrest you.
    …I’m laughing & typing at the same time now. A is trying to get B to give him back the play money so they can reset the game, but she doesn’t want to because she wants them to fill up her new wallet, or “waw-dit” as the baby says 😉 …
    A: Give them to me!
    B: No, they’re mine now!
    A: We’re playing store!
    B: We’re not right now, we’re arguing!

  • Kath

    So, funny story:

    A long time ago, when a friend, J, was a wild flower child university youth, she decided to give LSD a go. She did her research, was confident she was prepared for anything that could happen, and had set up a ‘safe place’ in her dismal student accommodation to sit for the day.

    The assigned moment came, and J did the deed, but wasn’t really sure it had worked since she wasn’t entirely confident with the actual taking instructions she’d been given. Finally, after about an hour when she wasn’t feeling anything like what the other uni kids had told her about, she concluded the whole experiment had been a dud and called me up to hang out. I was just about to take my great dane Sam for a walk, so I said I’d pick her up and we could hang out.

    Half way to the dog park J looked down to discover she’d walked out of the house without shoes. She made a silly excuse, and since she’s a lovely silly lady usually I didn’t really notice that much. We had a pretty uneventful walk, although J was a teensy bit vague at times.

    Several months later, when we were up late drinking cheap red wine and declaring our undying friendship for one another, she confessed that in fact, all those months ago, she’d been tripping massively for that whole dog park walk! She said she realised when she jumped into my beat up little car and looked back at charming old Sam. Apparently a giant great dane is quite a sight when one is tripping on acid! (not scary, thankfully. Old Sam was the most polite dog you ever met : P)

  • eleni antoniou

    Check out my blog. think it might put a smile on your face. xxx

  • Shiowei

    One of my 4th grade student’s mothers was telling me about their mother-daughter tea they had so they could talk about puberty and periods. The mother was re-explaining to her daughter that periods are not scary, they are just our body’s way of preparing for a baby. My student replied, “Oh, so every month it’s like a baby drill?” I thought that was too cute.

  • Laura

    Funny fact: Sea otters have flaps in their armpits. They store leftover food in there. True story!

  • Erica

    Pictures of food and drink while Ingrid Michaelson’s sings that happy song “Everybody”?

  • Adeline

    Laura – I LOVE the idea of storing leftovers in your armpits. I won’t do it, I promise, but that’s pretty cool.

    No funny story off the top of my head sadly, but a few words of encouragement: GOOD JOB! You’re almost there, and the old/new house sounds like it’s very much worth all the work!!

  • Carly

    My three year old son has deiscovered superheroes curtosy of some friends’ kids. At breakfast the other day, he said to me, “Mom, what does Iron Man do?” My five year old daughter, in an exasperated voice, said “Ugh, he IRONS, Ben.”

    Also, if you need a laugh, this is my favourite Flight of the Conchords song:

  • Shawna

    File under HELPFUL – Not sure where you are in Marin, but my daughter went to a FABULOUS preschool there so PM me if you want the name. It’s a bit pricey but totally worth it. I wish we were still in Marin so my son could go there but alas we’re East Bay peeps now.

    • Tracy

      We’ve got it covered. Thank you for looking out for me!

      • Shawna

        Of course! I panicked when I had to look for one for my son but didn’t want to make the trek all the way over the bridge.

  • Allyn

    I love that you’re moving into your childhood home! If mine wasn’t in Memphis, I would love it if my husband and I bought it. But no Memphis, thank you very much.
    Funny story:
    When I was nannying a few years back, I kept 3 boys under age 5 (which was seriously so much fun). The middle boy, age 3, started talking about the differences between girls and boys, getting into, ahem, anatomy. Once we established that yes, girls have a V and boys have a P, he turns to me and says “My daddy has a REALLY REALLY big P.”
    I could never quite look his dad in the eye after that.

    • Tracy

      ooooh god! Cindy left a comment with the same kinda story. I hope Cooper doesn’t say anything! Wait…maybe I don’t

  • Jimi

    A few weeks ago, my husband and 12-year old son, who happens to be a foodie in the making, stumbled upon a small craft fair and decided to look around for a bit. One of the booths had some anitiques, and spying an old phone, my very excited 12-year old proclaimed “Look! It’s a rotisserie phone!!” I smiled about that rotisserie phone the rest of the day.

    • Tracy

      highlight of my day. I keep saying rotisserie phone over and over in my head.

  • Christina

    If a baby in a bathrobe doesn’t make you smile I don’t know what will!

  • Sonia

    congrats on your new place. that must be fun!

    as far as stories go, you can listen to the podcast on my most recent post of my blog. hope you enjoy =)

  • laura k

    Try to enjoy the settling in process! I sometimes find all that organization time fun. Then again, I’ve never done it with a toddler underfoot.

    Here’s a funny moment for you: We were in Santa Cruz last weekend having breakfast at my favorite spot, and the family at the table across from us was…mesmerizing. Picture: Tall, slightly gaunt man with wild white hair tufting out all over and a Ron Paul Revolution t-shirt on. Mildly wrinkled older lady with a GIANT grey-feathered and be-sequined hat, flowing flowery jacket, and bell-bottoms. Two very blonde teenagers with Capitola Half Marathon t-shirts and running pants. It was a confusing and kind of hilarious scene.

    And also a stellar breakfast. If you’re ever in Santa Cruz, you should check out Zachary’s for breakfast. One of the only places I’ve been to where I think the wait is worth it.

  • Jen W

    Excited to see pics of your new place…I loved the tour of your last home.

    Here’s a fun story about being mailed a WMD:

    And here’s Rick James in a tree house made of money:

  • Stephanie

    I had an unusual standoff with an owl last Saturday morning. For the past couple of years, we’ve spotted the own around our house (we live in a semi-wooded area), and, as of late, he’s been making himself more and more visible. While taking my dog on a walk last week, my mom and I spotted the strewn feathers of one of his avian victims scattered about the trail, so we guessed that his HQ must be somewhere close. It turns out, we were correct.

    Fast forward to Saturday, I was walking along the trail, the same path I take multiple times each week to walk to the grocery store, when I spotted him. It was the owl, perched on a log right along the pathway, staring me down. We made eye contact. I giggled at finally seeing him up close. I continued walking along the path, and as I got closer, the owl took increasing offense to my presence. He suddenly got all puffed up and started clicking at me, and I was genuinely concerned that he was about to fly right at me and make a hearty attempt at making a snack out of me. I could not have that, and I really didn’t want to see the completely foolish news headline “Girl Attacked by Owl while Walking to Store” on the evening news. Now, I always carry pepper spray with my while walking through the woods, just in case I run into Bigfoot or other woodland undesirables. That said, it crossed my mind that that may have been my only defense should the owl come swooping toward me. Perhaps that would have been a worse headline: “Girl pepper sprays owl and is thought a cruel fool by community”. Luckily, it didn’t come to that. I maintained eye contact with the owl, but slowly backed away. For want of not further irking the aforementioned large, predatory bird, I jumped off the path and climbed through the woods Katniss-style. All the while, I could see the owl watching me through the trees. However, he’d deflated and no longer appeard to feel so threatened. I quickly went on my merry way, and escaped the encounter fully intact and with a bizarre story to tell.

    I hope you got a wee chuckle out of my story and have a wonderful day! You’re new pad looks fantastic!

    • Tracy

      Owl standoff!! Thank you for that…I kinda wish you were in the news. You could have been THAT girl! 🙂

  • Lisa

    How awesome to live in the house where you grew up!

    I have a 3 year old boy, Zeke, and here’s a cute story for you. Well, made me laugh.

    Friday I was out for drinks with the girls at my neighbor’s house and my husband, Chris, was trying to put Zeke to sleep. Normally, I sing him a couple songs before bed. Chris doesn’t sing. At all. We have a song book so Chris was flipping through it trying to sing him songs. Awe. He reached a song I normally sing and must have been totally butchering it. Zeke tipped his head back against the wall, rolled his eyes and said, “Oh. My. Goodness!” Wonder where he learned that one? 🙂

    Try and enjoy the start of your new chapter as much as you can. No do overs!

  • Olga

    Here’s a cute story…
    I hadn’t seen my nephew for a bit (he was about 5 at the time), so when I saw him he seemed extra-big. I said “hey Parks, did you grow an extra foot????”….
    He looked down at his feet and said in a confused voice “no, I still have two feet”…..

    I couldn’t stop laughing…

  • Bailey W.

    Funny Story (Actually more of a ‘Hey, Lets Be Bold” kind of a story)

    So I’m sitting at this restaurant, Native Foods, with my friend. We see this guy walking around, working and we’re both like, oh man, he is cute. So he brings our food over and we get a better look. Yup. Still cute. Now, I’m starting to get bold, staring to feel good about myself. When he comes by again, I tell him, “I just want to let you know, I think you’re really cute,”. He smiles and says “Thanks. I think you’re cute, too”. This is when I start to get a goofy smile on my face. He walks away and my friend and I are gushing about what just happened. He comes back, asks if we need anything else, and I freak out. I start stammering and fumbling over my words before blurting out that we don’t need anything. I felt like an idiot. BUT. Later. He walks by again. Still feeling bold, I ask for his number. I get it. We got frozen yogurt the other night. Making plans to see each other again. Sometimes, its worth it to be bold. =]

    • Tracy

      It pays to be bold. It really does. It knocks people out of their comfort zones and gets you mad respect!! Good move. Bold move!

  • Anna

    Well, currently I’m mowing down a turkey-lettuce-cucumber-colby jack sandwich slathered with garlic and chive hummus. It’s the BOMB.

    But I’m totally into collecting as much vintage plaid (or just straight up vintage) skirts/dresses/etc as possible. It’s been a totes blast =)

    Right now, my favourite is a traditional pleated black, yellow, blue and red plaid skirt(I’m thinking it’s probably the Royal Stewart Tartan) that hits right above my knees. It has the most mega twirling capabilities!

  • Rebecca A Eide

    TRACY! You shouldn’t stress… you should go BUY some booze if you can’t find yours, put on the Night at the Roxbury soundtrack, and smile. Trust me on this one 🙂

    In the meantime, I have a short, yet relatively entertaining story to tell you. My boyfriend is also enduring a move right now, out of his mother’s basement. Finally, right? Yesterday I was at my b/f’s mother’s house, and he was looking for a bag to clean up dog doo-doo from the backyard. Usually he has these biodegradable ones, they’re paper with a non-leak lining. He couldn’t find one though, so I said to him, “I’ll go inside and grab a plastic bag and a paper bag, and you can line the paper bag with the plastic one…” and I was looking at him when I said this, and not 2 seconds later, his mother chimed in thinking we were talking about his packing and moving, “you know, I’ve got some bubble wrap if you guys need it.” There was a moment of silence as him and I looked at each other in the eyes, and we both realized how hilarious it was to consider wrapping dog doo-doo in bubble wrap. We cracked up laughing! Anyway, maybe one of those, you had to be there moments, but it was priceless!

    • Tracy

      Night at the Roxbury was one of my first dates with Casey. HA!

      hahaha! bubble wrap poo. Can you imagine?

  • Kendra

    Think about Prince in a dunking booth. Done.

  • cindy

    I think you should TOTES save that bottom shelf of contact paper. It’s so throwback, amazing, AND your mom put it there!

    Okay, so I have the best story for you from my preschool teaching days…and it involves one of my favorite kids ever who happens to be named Cooper too!
    I used to be the lead teacher in a two-year-old classroom and we had potty trainers and kids still in diapers, so I’m changing a boy named Cooper’s diaper and he points to his business and says

    Cooper: “that’s my penis!”
    Me: “it sure is!”
    Cooper: “My daddy has one. It’s REEEEALY big.”

    OMG. All I could do was laugh. I told his mom about it and she thought it was great…apparently the little guy was obsessed with following his dad into the bathroom…then, she TOLD him about it and we didn’t make eye contact for a solid 6 months. I think he was more embarrassed than I was.

  • Annalise N.

    So I took a trip this weekend driving from LA and Phoenix and what did I do to pass the time? I listed to a bunch of Joy the Baker podcasts! I am TOTALLY behind in them because I moved recently and no longer have an hour long commute to work. Needless to say, the podcasts kept me busy while my fiance slept in the car. So I have to say that I loved the one you did about Red flags! So many of the things that you guys brought up I totally agreed with especially when you mentioned a guy who lived with his parents…in his 30s!! I know Joy didn’t respond to that one as much as you expected, but I totally did! The whole time you were talking about red flags all I could think about was, Red Flag: when a guy lives with his parents and has NEVER moved out, is 29, plays StarCraft on Friday nights instead of hanging with his girlfriend and can’t spend the night with this girlfriend on weekdays. Yah, that was my life for 5 months. And people warned me, but did I listen? NOOO! Well, thank goodness that is over! Anywho, thought you might get a kick out of that since you mentioned it.

    good luck with your moving. I have lived in my new place for 5 months and I am STILL looking for one of my liquor boxes. Really, did we hide it THAT well?? Hope you find yours soon!

  • Beth

    Jon Hamm as a Jamaican nurse:

  • Marissa | Pinch&Swirl

    Yesterday as my husband closes the oven door he says to it, “Shut your pie hole.”
    No? Then check this out – ever seen Jim Gaffigan? (not 100% clean kidwise 🙂

    Excited for you in your new digs!!

  • Lauren

    I am in the process of moving, too! This move is momentous: moving in with the boyfriend. I think that’s a sign it’s time to get rid of some stuff.

    A (very) partial list of embarrassing things I have found while packing:
    – Bag of stuffed animals, including a shirtless Winnie the Pooh
    – Football-themed pencil from 7th grade crush
    – Photographs from high school of people I don’t remember
    – Gallon-sized Ziploc bag of screws
    – Half-completed jigsaw puzzles
    – College textbooks, including seven unread Eastern Philosophy books (Upanishads?!?!)

    Totally keeping the stash of elaborately folded notes on three-ring binder paper, though. Can’t part with them quite yet. Maybe those will go in the next move.

    P.S. It’s a lot easier to undo my crazy packrat ways with the help of a cocktail. I’m packing liquor last.

    • Tracy

      I was going through some of my notebooks from college when I was packing up my house and read some of my Art History finals…whoa HOW DID I KNOW ALL THAT STUFF?!! I sounded super smart.

  • Greta

    OK, this is just crazy.
    I, too, am in the midst of deep cleaning and organizing of my home.
    We’ve lived here 3 years–long enough to unpack and know what needs to stay and how things need to be arranged.
    I’ve been tackling one project at a time.
    Next up is my pantry and all the kitchen cabinets.
    I wanted to lay down contact paper, but haven’t been able to find any that I like.
    Last night I dreamt my mom found a roll of vintage contact paper at a garage sale and gave it to me.
    I woke up determined to find some vintage contact paper for my shelves.
    And then I read your blog.
    Do you have any spare rolls of that paper laying around the house somewhere?
    I’ll buy it if you do!
    Happy cleaning!
    Love from,

    • Tracy

      whoa crazy!! who knows…maybe i’ll find some here! I’ll let you know 🙂 Good luck, Greta! We’re in this together.

  • NerdyBaker

    The snooping thing? I totally did that too! My mom always knew however because her underwear drawer was always disheveled (fascinated by all the straps and do-hickeys and never knowing where it all went and for what?) and I always had leftover makeup on my face. I actually don’t think my daughter’s do it, yet. Or they are really good at it and I can’t tell.

    • Tracy

      i was really into wearing my mom’s bras…yeah i just typed that. Hi mom!

  • Nicole

    You can do it, Tracy! It is so good that you and the “new light” in your home are friends. That’s exciting. I pulled this short video out of the archives for you 🙂

  • maija

    I’m so excited to see your pics evolve in this new setting! And how crazy to be an adult in your childhood house.

    Since everyone’s telling funny kid stories, I’ll share a FB status from my friend Amy that made me laugh out loud (her son Noah is a little bit older than Cooper):

    “Noah wants to be a ninja master when he grows up, because if he’s not a ninja master he’ll have to work in an office and if he works in an office he’ll have to have a mustache. And he does NOT want to have a mustache.”

    Yup, that’s what office is all about right?

    Also I’m really into the following right now:

    *Trader Joe’s Baked Jalapeno Cheese Crunchies (super addicting)
    *TJ’s NZ Apple Rings – healthy snack!
    *asparagus & ricotta on pizza
    *It Chooses You – Miranda July’s latest book about writing the script for her movie (The Future) and procrastinating on her writing by interviewing people who sell items in the Penny Saver – I think you’d love it as a writer. The Future is a fun/wacky movie too if you haven’t seen it yet.
    *coconut oil as a moisturizer – so yummy too.
    *thinking about storage options like under-the-bed-boxes as we prepare to move in July into a 50’s house that is 500 less sq ft than current house
    *planting the following at new house: blueberry bushes, magnolia, lilac, Japanese maple.
    *YELLOW + GRAY = new fave color combo

    • Tracy

      oooh It Chooses You sounds great and right up my alley! Thank you Maija!! I love your list too xoxo
      mustaches are no good! especially in offices…unless you are Ron Swanson. Then you’re cool.

  • Michelle H.

    Good luck with the move! Hope you find the liquor box soon – that box should always go in the car, along with jewelry and other valuables.

    2 laughs:

    1. My 2 boys, 5 and 2, fighting over a pile of acorns in the front yard, while the 5 year old screams “Stop touching my nuts!” at the top of his lungs. (The neighbors got a good laugh at that one)

    2. Older boy is 3, walks in on his grandmother while she’s going to the bathroom. “Grandma! Why does your penis have hair on it?” And then proceeds to tell everyone else in the house that grandma’s penis has hair on it.

    • Tracy

      i just died. boys and their nuts!!! and grandma’s penis…just WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Solid gold.

  • Elise @ yumfoodiefoodie

    Here’s a little mixie-poo for you! Just press play and relax away m’dear <3

  • Becky Back

    I tweeted this to you and Joy a few days ago. Inspiration for dancing in the laundromat 🙂

    • Tracy

      Yes!!! I love that video. It was in the show notes of last week’s podcast and in my I love lists!!! I’ve watched it like 10 times! I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE IT!!

  • lisa

    TOTALLY save the contact paper … i LOVE the colors and the “vintage” print! you can’t find anything like it anymore. and it’ll keep the old good memories top of mind.

    a good laugh courtesy of our little boy … after it being super-quiet in his bedroom for a good 15 minutes, my wife tiptoes over to peek in his door. there she sees him standing in front of the mirror, buck naked, shaking his hips about like a tahitian dancer, every once in a while striking a pose and intensely admiring his mirror image. after she comes back to the kitchen to tell me this, we have a good laugh over it for a couple of minutes and then our little boy struts into the kitchen – STILL buck naked – and asks, “mamas, why is my peepee SO big??!?”

    ahhhh … the joys of boys … =)

    best wishes with the move. enjoy the process of settling in and finding your groove in your old/new family home!

    • Tracy

      i just got sucked into this website. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!! hilarious.

  • Sarah

    Tracy! Your life sounds stressful and awesome. Cannot WAIT to see what you do with the house.

    As a distraction, have you seen the new Great Gatsby trailer?! Looks so good!

  • Heidi - Apples Under My Bed

    ok how’s this…I had a dream last night that I was a bridesmaid but had to wear my jeans under my dress because my aunty was poking me with a broom and i didn’t have time to change.
    Take your time, lovely!! we’ll be here. Moving blows.
    Heidi xo

  • Holly

    This might make you laugh. My husband is from Japan, and when he pronounces words starting with the letter “L”, it sounds like an “R” and vice versa. One day, many years ago, he was standing naked in front of the closet and scratching his behind. Then he turned his rear to face me and said “Do I have a rump?” (He meant “lump” as in a bite, like a flea or mosquito bite) I said, “Yes, you have a “rump” (meaning butt). I was cracking up and he didn’t know why until I told him what a “rump” is.

  • corvallisfoodie

    TRACY! You are awesome. I think it would be kinda crazy to live in my parents old house. Here’s something fun, if you like bourbon (and when you find your booze box) try this drink:


    Bourbon (2oz)
    Amaretto (1 oz– or to taste)
    Squeeze 1/2 a lemon into the glass
    add a few dashes of bitters

    Serve with ice. Yum. It’s totally what I’m in to right now. It turned me into a bourbonite.

    I love your site and what you do. Keep being you, because everyone loves it.

    • Tracy

      oooh. i think i have some homemade amaretto somewhere! i’m gonna try this. THANK YOU!

  • Wesley @ the way home

    I hate to shamelessly self-promote but my mom wrote most of this herself so I don’t feel that bad, and hopefully it will entertain you.

    Maybe you too will be blessed with a bird’s nest at your new abode.

  • Kate @ eatrecyclerepeat

    My 9 year old brother called my sister after he got home from Disney/Epcot. Instead of buying a pirate hat or Mickey ears, he got a book called The Truths of Buddhism. He proceeded to explain to my sister the reasons for extinction and suffering, and also how Buddhism supported the fact that the Packers were the greatest football team ever. Who would have thought that theme parks could be such a religious experience.

  • jen

    lunch mishap: i was totally pumped for my leftover sun dried tomato and goat cheese ravioli with brown butter and sage for lunch today, so i grabbed the container from the office fridge and opened the lid to heat it up. what i found in the container was my husband’s week old pizza hut cinnamon sticks. bummerz. i treated my self to a salad and ice cream to make up for it! good luck unpacking!

  • Danica Evans

    True story. Requires you know the difference between a uvula (hangy ball in the back of your throat) and a vulva (female genitalia). Enjoy my very embarrassing moment….

    Once upon a time, there was a nursing student.

    And as luck would have it she got sick. A sore throat and a very very swollen hangy ball thingy in the back of her throat (also known as the uvula). Now when I say swollen, I mean swollen. So large it caused occasional choking and gagging.

    She decided to go to the doctor. Being a student, she went to a clinic that had med students practicing. The young student doctor came into the room. He began his assessment.

    “What’s bothering you today?”

    The young nursing student, not wanting to use silly old layman’s terms when she was an educated individual, confidently stated…

    “My vulva is so swollen I’ve been choking on it.”

    Classy. So so classy. Oy.

    • Tracy

      OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMG. I would have totally said that. Super classy. Thank you for that.

  • jenn geibel

    i insisted my husband clean out his underware drawer & get rid of all the holey ones….the next morning we saw our neighbor picking up underware off of his front lawn. we thought, “wow, dave had an awesome party last night…someone got naked!”….then slowly realized that a raccoon (or homeless person??) had gotten into our garbage cans & apparently dropped my husbands drawers in our neighbors yard….good times.

  • liz

    this makes me laugh EVERY time i watch it. and I’m probably on my 25th viewing.

  • Linda

    Tracy, being the foodie you are, maybe you will appreciate this joke:

    Q: Why don’t cannibals eat clowns?
    A: Because they taste funny!

    See you In August!

  • Gaby

    Hi Tracy! I had a class where we started every Thursday with a YouTube video, and I always share this particular clip with anyone who’s got a lot on their plate and needs a pick-me-up. I hope this helps!

  • Jen

    I just wanted to let you know that your organization and fashion tips are doing some good out there in the world. I am a relative newcomer to Shutterbean and also your & Joy’s podcast so I am catching up on all your old episodes. One of your old episodes was talking about ruts – fashion ruts & and a cargo capri pant phase.

    Today I got out my summer clothes to rotate into my closet and came across my embarrassingly large array of cargo capris. I could hear you both in my head just telling me they are not as cute as I think they are and it is time to step away from the cargos and, yes, all those pockets are not doing me any favours. I immediately went and donated them before I could think twice.

    I have decided to start a new cute dresses phase this summer. Thanks for the inspiration! Keep doing what you are doing…ridding the world of cargo capris one closet at a time.

  • Kate

    Oh em geeeee I totally used to go through my mom’s earrings and daydream about what they would look like on me! 🙂

    Good luck with the move and hang in there! I’m sort of obsessed with Game of Thrones right now…I insisted on reading the book before I watched the HBO series and it is sooo good. If you need a new tv show when you’re ready to settle in, I think it’ll be a good one!

  • Sharon

    Keep the contact paper – love it! A recent snuggle in bed conversation with my five year old:
    Me: Why do you need a new bike?
    Jarvis: My bike hurts my balls.
    Me: (really trying to hold back laughter): That’s not really an appropriate word.
    Jarvis: Nuts?
    Me: (laughing) No.
    Jarvis: Cucumber?

    And then we both broke down in laughter. Big brothers know the best words to teach their little brothers. And Jarvis will say anything to make me laugh.

  • Kristen

    It’s short. It’s hilarious. I cry from laughter every time I watch it.

  • P

    The other day I had on a bright green avocado and oatmeal facial mask and decided to water the flowers in my (privacy fenced) backyard. Of course, the garbage crew chooses that moment to drive through the alley and pick up our trash. The driver gave me the craziest look. But… that’s what he gets for creeping into peoples’ yards.

    • Tracy

      woooops. I’ve had one of those moments before. It’s terrifying!

  • Winter

    What two farm animals are the sexiest?

    Brown chicken, brown cow!

    (Good luck with all the moving!)

  • Heidi

    In a fit of desperation, I bought a girdle. A size small spanx-ish elastic tube thing (most of the clothes I buy are smalls, so I thought I needed a small girdle). I tried it on at home, put one leg in, and it didn’t look like I could get my other one in. So I thought, “maybe it’s supposed to go on over my head instead of feet first.” I got my arms up and in, my head, and my shoulders. And then I was stuck. I wrestled around in a sweaty-claustrophipic-desperate manner for about ten minutes. I thought I was going to die. Just as I was about to run out into the yard in my undies, trapped in a girdle, to have my boyfriend CUT ME OUT OF IT — something gave loose and I was free!
    And thank god, because Nicky would have definitely taken pictures of this before cutting me out of that elastic-chinese-finger-trap.

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